Old Quotes

First thing in the morning, Abbie came to me. This is all she said: "I was just...farting...in my bed."

"So Nate...Let's talk about our faces." --Abbie

"I love you so much it's retarded." --Seth Meyers in Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist

"Abbie can sleep on the top bunk when it's raining." --Nate
"Why when it's raining?" --Alan
"If there's a hole in the ceiling..." --Nate

Hey Abbie, did you know that I have a bed made for two?" --Jacob Senior

"Abbie, let's go down to our room and turn the light off and look at my underwear!" --Jacob Senior
"His underwear glow in the dark." --Melissa (mom) Senior

"Sometimes we eat chicken, and sometimes we just leave them alone." --Nate "And sometimes we put chickens on your face!" --Abbie

"Is she a butter face? A what? A butter face. Everything's nice but her face." --Michelle

"Let's try to keep it wholesome here, girls." --Melissa

"I was born a pig!?!" --Nate (after asking the Magic 8 Ball if he was born a pig and it answering yes)

"Abbie, please don't play with the door. How many times do I have to tell you that? --Me
"Like 43." --Abbie

"Lick it or Ticket." --Andrea

"What about Shit County?" --Nate as he and Abbie were making up different county names in WI. (It was a made-up word, I hope.)

"Open your crotch." --Abbie to me as she was trying to pry my legs apart

"You are a pussyhead." --Nate to Alan (No, we don't use that word and we don't know where he got it from)

"You're voting for Obama!" --Nate to Abbie
"Your body is so bama!" --Abbie

"I'm wet! --Abbie
"Where are you wet?" --Alan
"My penis." --Abbie

"Dude, what's your deal?!" --Nate

"I farted up the storm!" --Abbie

"Mommy, when are we getting a new baby?" --Abbie

"When you were a baby, songs were written about your poops, they were so big."--Alan to Nate

"My lovely lady bum." (To the tune of that horrible Hump or Lump or whatever it is song) --Abbie

"The rat of God?" --Nate (wrath)